These tips are for learning how to act around women, and can teach you what to do to make women want you. Learn how to behave around women in this section, and watch the positive changes begin.
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Conversation Tips - Learn the necessary conversation techniques and become great at talking to women. Learn what to say to women and how to say it in many critical situations.
Flirting Tips - It is vital for any player to know how to flirt with women if he wants to pick them up. Learn all of the best flirting tips to improve your skills at flirting with women.
Inner Game Tips - Learn tips that will teach you how to be confident around women and how to believe in yourself. An often overlooked, yet very important aspect of the game.
Outer Game Tips - These tips are for learning how to act around women, and can teach you what to do to make women want you. Learn how to behave around women.
Lifestyle Tips - The way you live your everyday life has a greater impact on relationships with women than you think! These tips will help you lead a lifestyle women are drawn to.
Dating Tips - Use this section to master the art of dealing with relationships, how to handle the first date, where to go on a date, and many other great strategies for dating women.
User Submitted Tips - These tips have been sent in by players wanting to add their knowledge to the Becomeaplayer.com resource. Don't forget to send in your own tips as well!
The Outer Game Tips...
The approach
Mastering the approach is a crucial component in the arsenal of a PUA. It is important to remember that it is not about the words you use, but rather the attitude and mind frame you have. Even with the best lines and techniques at your disposal without the right mindset they will be ineffective. It is not about the words you use or the actions you do, it is how you say the words and how you perform the actions. Always approach with confidence, and a positive attitude; without these traits women will see through the "front" you are putting up. Also, relax and have fun, and soon you will be approaching any women with ease. - by Baller21
The alpha presence
Let it be known when you walk in a room. Take up space and have confident but comfortable body language. Speak with a strong articulate voice. Have good posture and make slow deliberate movements. Remember to be comfortable with any situation at all times. When your comfortable around a woman she becomes comfortable as well. Women are naturally attracted to the alpha and once you develop this type of presence, you will be amazed at the different responses you get from women. - by Lady Killa
Gaming virgins!
The issue about Virgins is that their ASD (anti-slut-defense) is set to automatic, so you have to first build a lot rapport and comfort which will lead to trust, but how do you do this? First thing you do is run your normal game by creating interest and attraction. Once you have created attraction you have to build a lot rapport by creating bonds, such as sharing similarities and kino to increase comfort. Once you have rapport you have to escalate kino and teasing slowly and progressively, following the push pull formula. If you push too much or pull too much you risk over-complimenting or over-negging. Balance your push and pulls and create rapport and she will give it up 100%! - Player87
If you love it...
... let it go. One of the biggest traps new players get sucked into is getting too attached to a set once they make progress. Male-pattern tunnel vision. As a PUA, you must always be willing to leave a set, no matter what your progress with them when the situation calls for it. Here's something you can do to build your non-stick layer: Go up to a few sets and open them until one receives you very openly. Flirt unforgivably, and raise the hell out of that kino. Then, right before you would close. Just leave. "Sorry, I have to go", and walk away. If you can do that, then you've reached a major milestone. - Moose
Staying in control
One of the fundamental things in seduction that will either lead to your success or failure with any given girl is how well you maintain control of your interactions. One way you could react to "I'm bored!", "What's up?" and "Entertain me" is by responding with something funny in an attempt to do exactly what she says and entertain her. But wait a minute: she's telling you that she's bored and you obey her command and entertain her- doesn't that mean that she's in control of the conversation? So... we need to think of a way we can respond to that that keeps you in control of the conversation while still letting her enjoy the interaction. How we can do that is by re-framing her command and redirecting the conversation the direction you want. How I personally like to do that most of the time is by negging her then totally changing the flow of the conversation. My entire idea of the purpose of negs is that they exist for you to remind the girl what the power balance between the two of you is and that you're the alpha who controls how things happen in this world. This sort of situation is exactly the right place to employ them, since you need to correct her mistaken belief that she controls the conversation (btw I had a girlfriend a while back who used to do this all the time too and this can be actually quite fun if you turn these sort of statements around on her). - Goldi
The peacock open
In short, Peacocking is wearing something that stands out and grabs attention (e.g. Bright T-shirt, Shiny belt buckle, Cowboy hat, etc.). A lot of people peacock but don't utilize it for seduction. A lot of times (with the exception of night game) a woman will not go further than saying "I like your shirt." In response to such a comment simply say "Thanks, I like your ______" and initiate kino, then ask for her name and begin flirting away. - by Anubis
Balancing cocky & funny
Balance, the way to balance your cockiness is to be more funny. That will offset the negative citations of your high confidence levels and allow you to avoid giving off a self-centered vibe. However, you don't even have to toss on more funny to balance the cocky, you can just tone down the cocky and try to be more friendly. When you're really cocky, girls tend to either think you're an asshole, or they figure that you are interested in getting in their pants. Step it down a bit and use a bit of that nice guy inside you, which may or may not have been the reason you ended up here to begin with. We tend to overcompensate for our niceness by being very confident and cocky, but then you realize you overshot your mark and have to try again a little lower. I got called a cocky asshole for YEARS, I mean from the time I was like 8 till I was 20. By being mildly friendly, you can slip in the cracks and then once you get in close, you can strike without them seeing it coming and they are thoroughly surprised, but in a good way. I'm not saying to go overboard and be her friend, because we know you just end up with LJBF and that's no good either. Happy medium is the key to not just pick up, but all of life. - Player87
Action = Success
The key to success is ACTION. Instead of trying to figure out the best way to approach, then start doing it, which is useless. There is no 'secret formula' that loosens the pants of a woman! Seduction is a learning process, every approach leads to an outcome that you benefit from; success or feedback. If you succeed, bear in mind what you've done well in the approach. If not, you have gained experience and think where things may gone wrong, and implement this acquired knowledge into your next approach. Simple isn't it? - Player87
Expand your playing field
Always be on the lookout for women wherever you are, some of the most unusual places may just turn out to be the best in terms of places where you can find single women. Bars, clubs and parties will always guarantee that you will pick up a girl if you have enough game and try hard enough... but sometimes places like supermarkets, laundromats, parks and beaches can prove to be even easier places to be successful. Why? You have much less competition, sometimes none... plus women tend to go into "bitch mode" a lot faster when they are situations where they know that many men will be hitting on them... so it's much better to approach them in other situations where they will most likely have let their guard down. Some people may try to tell you that in certain places you simply can not pick up girls... but they are wrong. I can tell you from my own personal experiences that even though some places may be better than others... no areas are "off limits" or impossible, anyone who tells you differently probably just didn't have enough game when they tried. Experiment and try to approach girls everywhere you go, you may even get lucky and find a gold mine of hot babes with their defenses down ready to be pulled!
What makes an alpha
Girls are attract to alpha males, we all know this. It's built into them just like it is built into us to stare at a nice rack or ass... we simply can't help it, and neither can they. Right now I am about to explain the #1 thing that separates the alpha males from the rest of the pack... and no it is NOT confidence. You can have so much confidence that it seeps out of your ears but will still always be out done by someone that has this quality: Initiative. Initiative means that you are always first, and make sure of it. You are the first to make a move in all situations: You walk straight up to a girl and initiate a conversation with her instead of waiting for her to come to you, you never walk behind other people when walking in a group... you stay in the front, you are the first to go when participate in activities like sports, you always go for the first kiss without asking, you always make the first move towards sex and always lead the girl to the bedroom, you are always the one who drives when you go out with others. Get the idea? Many guys have confidence, but not all of them can be called true alpha males because they lack initiative... and that is the trait that defines a true alpha male. At all times you should guarantee that you have the initiative, especially when you are in the presence of the opposite sex... even fight for it if you have to.
Want a dime piece?
Do you know what a perfect 10 is? Is the best looking girl you've ever seen one? Maybe, but maybe not... because for a girl to be a dime piece they need to have more than just looks. I'm talking gorgeous, intelligent, trustworthy and down to earth... a QUALITY girl. That is what you really want right, a girl that is beautiful as well as secure in herself that will never cheat on you or embarrass you in front of people by making ditsy comments? Sure you do. However, if you want to attract a quality girl... you will need to be able to show them that you are a quality guy as well, and the most important step in becoming a quality guy is have a skill. You need to be good at something, and I'm not talking about your job, I'm talking about an interesting thing that you do and are good at that adds substance to your character and makes you seem like a more interesting and motivated person. Don't get me wrong, by using what you learn from this web site you can easily pick up hot girls, and even get a really beautiful as you girlfriend... but on looks alone a girl can only rank at about an 8, maybe a 9. If you really want to get a "dream girl" you've got to add that extra something to your life that makes you stand a step above all of the other guys that are good at getting girls... and that extra something is exactly what all of those perfect 10's are looking for. They want something more because they can literally pick any guy they want and have him, so it's only natural for them to try and find the best. You can choose any skill that you want, as long as it is something that is interesting and impressive... if you love music anything in that field works perfectly. You can also learn how to read palms, women absolutely love when a guy knows how to do that. Can you draw or paint fairly well? Being an artist is another great skill that women admire. Be creative and have fun, you don't even need to be the best at the skill you choose, as long as you become good enough to show the ladies that you are dedicated to it and actually enjoy it.
Your social value
If you have been studying seduction material for a while chances are you've heard the term "Social Proof" before. The most simple way to describe social proof is that it is your "local fame" within your network of friends and/or acquaintances, otherwise referred to as your "circle". When you are trying to determine how much social proof you have, it is important to understand that it is NOT the amount of fame that you have, but rather the amount of fame that you have compared to the other people within your circle. Are you the leader or a follower? Do people favor your opinion over those of others? Are you the first person that people call when they want to find out what is going down during the weekend? Do you get a high level of respect from those around you? These are all questions that you
need to ask yourself to determine your overall social proof... and if you answered negatively to any of the above then you will need to do some work on improving your value within your circle. Men that have the most social proof within their group are always viewed as the most powerful, and women find that power to be very attractive. This is why men that are viewed of the leader typically have their pick of the women that are in the group as well as any new ones that are introduced in the future. Build up your social value and the women will automatically want you instead of any of your friends, and you will also gain a higher level of respect from everyone you encounter.
Baby steps
Ok, I'm assuming that you've already committed yourself to learning everything that this web site has to offer so that you will eventually know every single trick to picking up women... congratulations. However, now is the time when you need to recommit yourself to something totally different, and ultimately much more important : Using what you know! You may now know 1001 seduction techniques, but all of your studying will be in vain unless you make the conversion and turn them into seduction SKILLS. Simply knowing what you are doing is less than half of the battle, actually being able to do it is the hard part... and the only way to get to that point it by honing your skills with some good ol' fashioned practice. One of the most common mistakes that guys who come to this web site make is believing that they must learn EVERYTHING before they do ANYTHING, this is totally wrong. Have you ever heard the saying "Don't bite off more than you can chew"? It applies here. If you pack your head full of as much as you can and then try to use it, you will only succeed in confusing yourself and adding to your failure. You do not need to know everything in order to pick up one girl, if you choose one simple strategy that you like it will be all you'll need at first... then when you master that you can move on to others. If you practice in this fashion eventually you will know so much AND be good at it as well, that you will be able to switch up your technique at the drop of a dime if what you are doing seems to be not working. Baby steps my young players, baby steps.
Pay her no mind, she'll love you for it!
Hot woman are used to being showered with attention from men. It had been happening to them since they were infants : Age 0 - "Aww, she's soooo precious!", Age 4 - "She's just beautiful", Age 10 - "She's gonna be a hotty!", Age 18 - "Damn, she IS a hotty!". They have heard those things thier entire lives, and now that they have grown into women it's so programmed into thier minds that they barely even care when you walk up and say "Your beautiful". However, they DO care when you don't do that... and even act like they don't impress you at all. Treating beautiful women like they are flawed is the ONLY way to attract them.
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