Dear The Player,
What’s the best way to handle the question, “How many women have you been with?”
Back when I was in college, it seemed easier to field this one – a low number always seemed safe, since it made the girl feel more special and it was acceptable to have limited “experience”.
I’m in my early thirties now and, while a low number might make the girl feel special, I’m thinking that she’d rather not give a tutorial to someone who claims to have only been with a handful of women. On the other hand, the truth might not cast you in the best light – even if triple digits factored over 15 years isn’t such a big deal (7-8 per year), when a woman hears “more than 100” it’s over. (To that end, I think that anything over 15 or 20 might be offensive to the “weaker” sex.)
When it’s come up, I’ve tried dodging the question with “Look, I’m clean of any diseases, if that what you’re worried about. Let’s leave our pasts in the past – I’m not asking about your past, and you should ignore mine. What’s important is our future together, and I only want to be with you.” It generally works.
However, I’ve come across a couple of ladies that don’t accept that, and press me for a number.
Your advice?
Mike
That's a good question Mike,
Whenever I get hit with that annoying inquiry I always say seven, without hesitation. If I get the idea that she does not approve or believe me, I proceed to explain that most of those were over long-period relationships. Women are always seeking men that will stay with them, and by saying a low number with that explanation she will get the impression that you are one of those men, thus turning an awkward question into more points for you.
That's just my thing... and you must take into account that I've yet to hit 30. From my experience with women I believe that many may actually like the fact that their man has been with an abundance of women, because women are naturally attracted to men that are "in demand". However, this is un-tested (by me) and definitely has it's risks... some women may be impressed with a 20+ number, while others will be very turned off. I suggest only using a high number if you have good skills at "reading" people, in which case you should be able to tell which women are which, then apply the proper number accordingly.
My advice is to go with whatever you feel comfortable with. My lucky 7 technique has never failed me, and it has proved to be effective on women from a variety of age groups, which is the reason why I have not strayed far from it.
If you do, however, decide to take the "Evil Knievel" route and tell her that you've had sex with more women than Peter North... let me know what kind of reactions and results that you encounter.
- The Player
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