Dear The Player,
Hey. My name is Wesley, I'm 17 years old and go to a small private high school. Well, of course there's this girl and I'm crazy about her. Just being around her makes me melt. I've known her for about 2 1/2 years and not until recently, about 2-3 months ago, have we really started talking and hanging out. I've fallen in love with this girl. I never officially asked her out, but we have been to about 5 movies together.
They were sometimes flukes. For instance, I would be talking and would say something like, "That new James Bond movie is coming out tomorrow, I think I'm gonna go see it." And she would say, "Oh, me too. I'll go with you" She could obviously tell that I liked her, but I had no idea whether she liked me the same, or just as a friend.
So, one day she just asks me if I liked her. Me, being the dummy, confessed that I had a crush on her. Like I said, I can't figure this girl out, and she immediately asks if I want to go see a movie with her on Friday. Well, that's the last thing that we have done together outside of school. Because about a week after that, she says that she had been thinking and that she just wanted to be friends, and that she didn't see us as becoming anything more.
She said her previous relationships were horrible and she knew that if we went out, she would end up hurting me. Well, she still talked with me and even flirted with me after that. Someone at school was talking about a new movie coming out next week, and I was in the conversation and said that I was going to go see it. Well, the same girl I am crazy about asks me if I am going to go alone. I said I didn't know, then she said she would go with me, and that she would get the tickets in advance. So, we are going to the movies next week. I told myself that I was going to move on, and forget about her, but I can't.
I see her everyday at school. I can't figure this girl out. She is very social and talks and flirts with a lot of guys....well, I just don't know. I am in love with her. My question is, what do I do? Should I keep trying to forget about her even though she talks, flirts, and wants to do stuff with me? Or how can I make her want to be MORE THAN FRIENDS?
Later
What's Up Wesley,
Unfortunately when it comes to women, you really only get one chance... it's sucks but that's the rules of the game that we play. Her statement "My other relationships were bad and I don't want to hurt you" was a load of bullshit. The truth is that when you confessed your interest in her... she got turned off. It's good that you've already realized that mistake, so you probably won't make it again the next time around.
That's the bad news... the good news is that I don't think that your relationship with her had evolved enough to ruin your chances... and if you play your cards right you may still be able to get her.
The best tactic to use in a situation like the one that you are in is playing "hard to get"... and I've recently written an article on that subject that explains everything in detail. The article is called "Cat & Mouse" and you can find it in the articles section of my web site.
Good luck, and let me know how things turns out...
-The Player
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