It's astonishing how much horrible dating advice you can find on the internet.
So today I thought I'd do some myth busting and rip apart three of the most prevalent online dating myths that are floating around and totally screwing guys up.
Consider yourself warned: Subscribing to any of these falsehoods is like wearing girl repellent.
1) Portray mystery
This is a myth propagated by a lot of the pickup artist types who assert that being mysterious and withholding information will intrigue and thereby attract women. And while there's a certain logic in only giving women a little taste of your awesomeness so that they end up wanting more, overall it's a bogus theory!
I mean seriously, none of the guys I know who are good with chicks (myself included) is the slightest bit mysterious, and it's not slowing us down...
Mystery is simply UNNECESSARY for attracting women whatsoever.
Look at some of the male celebrities that women drool over, guys like Brad Pitt, George Clooney, Zac Efron, or Matthew McConaughey... Are these guys mysterious?
Not at all, they're boy next door types. Joaquin Phoenix, there's a mysterious celebrity, and how many chicks are clocking him?
And online, “mysterious” is the last thing you want to come across as. Girls want to know what they're dealing with. Not being forthcoming about yourself is just going to make it seem like you have something to hide.
The only guys who will benefit from being mysterious are guys with horrible personalities, or magicians... so if you are going to be mysterious you might as well do some card tricks while you are at it.
2) Compliment girls online
This is really mainstream dating advice, the kind of thing you might hear from your mom or something, you know the whole “tell her she's pretty” thing... And it's about the least original, most WUSSYISH thing you could possibly do!
When you are emailing a girl on a dating site, you want to stand out as unique and differentiate yourself from all the other dudes whose whole game consists of telling her that she's hot.
Leading with a compliment or sending a compliment in any email lumps you in the same group as all of her sketchy “online admirers,” those guys who she never actually dates.
Instead, you've got to show her you're capable of talking about interesting things and not just kissing her ass.
And don't get me wrong, I'm a big fan of telling the women how awesome they are... I just don't think the internet is the place for it.
I'd wait until she's walking around in your bedroom with her hair wet, wearing lingerie THEN tell her she looks hot.
3) Be cocky and make witty little jokes
Are you stuck thinking you need to tease girls, use “negs”, and be a witty little ball-buster to get a female attention?
Seriously, that whole "show girls that you have the balls to tease them" is so eight years ago.
In fact this is a sure way to scare-off and WEIRD chicks out. It's crazy to me what some guys are attempting just to get a girls attention online... from the zany made up stories, to the "negs", to the qualifying, to the disqualifying.... it's just a hot mess.
Using these methods may work initially because they help you to stand out from all the boring bland guys, but they are also usually extremely transparent to women and will make you come off as inauthentic.
I've found that the main reason guys latch onto these flirty little routines is because they just don't know what the hell else to say to a woman.
They just haven't figured it out yet, and these “challenge her” and “show her your higher value” pick-up artist techniques are always being promoted as being fool-proof methods, so guys decide to give them a try.
And then if by shear luck one of them seems to work, guys decide that they need them.
It's pretty damn sickening.
But luckily for us we don't need to use them, because we can pull chicks like MEN!
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Dating Coach & Author
Online Dating Playbook