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Ever wonder why sometimes everything goes GREAT with a girl at first,
but then after the second date/meeting all of her interest in you
seems to have vanished? Then to make matters worse, she then proceeds
to ignore your phone calls and/or text messages, or responds saying
that she is too busy to hang out and straight up blows you off!
It's BS isn't it? You followed the game and did everything right when
you first met her, she was really digging you and the two of you may
have even gotten physical. So why for no apparent reason has her
attitude towards you done a full 180?
I've coached hundreds of men with this exact problem, and well over
90% of the time the problem lies in the lack of what I call
"Congruency Escalation". Men who have problems holding the interest
of women all seem to have this trait in common; the can not remain
congruent with the initial image of themselves that they displayed
to the women, and also lack the ability to escalate the image to
enforce it and prove that they ARE the type of guy that they led the
women to believe.
To put it simply, you are being a "let down" on the second date
because you weren't as fun or cool as you were on the first date. The
truth is, you need to be even MORE cool than you were at first,
because that is where the "escalation" part comes in. If you can't do
that, then women will always lose interest in you very quickly,
regardless of how physically attracted to you that they may be.
This is because when you first meet a woman and make an impression on
her, you are then fully bound to LIVE UP TO that impression. If during
your first meeting you make her believe that you are the coolest guy
she has ever met, then you've better be even cooler during the second
date. If you fail to live up to the standards that you set yourself
when you met her, it is game over.
So many men that I talk to and train on a daily basis place all of
their focus and energy on meeting new women and the "first encounter"
that they use up all of the best and most impressive things about
themselves right away in an attempt to close the deal and get her
number or get laid. What happens after that is the women comes to
meet with them a second time, and the man has nothing new to impress
her with and is either stuck talking about the same stuff she already
knows or doing the same stuff he did during the first encounter. This
leave ZERO room for escalation, and completely disrupts the
congruency of the image that the man initially displayed.
If a woman expects you to be this mysterious, cool guy that is always
going to surprise her and continually impress her with how interesting
you are, then you've better be prepared to actually BE that guy and
back it up. If you can't, then you should not have given her that
impression in the first place.
The ironic part about all of this is, in most cases it is the man
trying too hard to be perfect that ends up ruining everything.
Chances are the woman would have been into you just as much if you
would simply act normal and set REAL expectations for her rather than
attempting to appear to be someone that you are not. That way, you
leave yourself a whole lot of "head space" to escalate her view of
you as you move upward and become even more intriguing.
When her expectations are of you are sky high, all that you are going
to do is let her down.
If you want to experience long term success with women, you need to
understand that true game is not the act of pretending to be someone
that you are not, but rather the act of being REAL at first, then
blowing her away continually as time goes on. That is how you make a
woman fall in love with you. Lying and giving false impressions will
get you nowhere.
I hope this bit of free info helps a lot of you guys!
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